Looking Back
by whimsical-wily-wandering-wind
Summary: Kazeshini couldn't help but think back to the time he had to take care of the kid. What were his thoughts at this time? Why did he take care of the kid?
1. Chapter 1

Summary: What was Kazeshini thinking when he with the baby? He reminisces his time when he was with the kid. Based off episode 260.

**A/N:** **This is my first fanfiction. I hope you enjoy what I've wrote. All criticism will be accepted but please don't hate me if you honestly don't like it. I never saw the full episode of 260 so I had decided to watch it online. Once I saw the whole thing, something just snapped and I thought, what if he was thinking these thoughts at the time? Then I decided to put it down. A little heads up, there are a few bad words in there, after all this story is T rated. Anyways, I hope you like it.**

Chapter 1- Memories

A lone figure squatted near the edge of a cliff, deep in thought. The figure was a young man that was entirely black with red outlines that that shaped his form, making him look like a walking shadow. He wore bandages, rather than clothes, that wrapped around his legs and shoulders, as well as bandages some on his arms. He wasn't exactly covered from head to toe and most of his bandages were wrapped on his figure; showing that he had a well toned body.

He felt his long mane of hair blow through the wind as he sat there, staring out into the wide view that stretched out in front of him. The lone young man had a demonic of look, with his sharp canine teeth, pointed ears, and his narrow eyes. If anyone saw him, they would probably say he looked intimidating, but despite the malevolent colors and demonic features, he had solid baby blue eyes.

He was Kazeshini.

Yes. Among all of the zanpakuto, he was known for his blood thirsty intent to kill, including that him and his damn shinigami were on bad terms. Right now, it seemed like his shinigami was in a good mood. The wind blew gently and the sun shown through clouds as they passed over head. At least the shinigami wasn't in a bad mood, which always made his inner world windy as hell, as well as making it thunder. It always pissed him off whenever he had to deal with the weather down here.

Since Kazeshini was his shinigamis 'darker self', as some people like to say, he acted differently than him. He was short tempered and enjoyed killing, something the damn shinigami either wasn't like or didn't like about him. That bastard. When is he ever going to realize that they were practically two sides of the same coin?

He remembered several things that had happened between them. He remembered a lot of things that they had dealt with. When his shinigami gained his shikai, when fucking admitted that he was disgusted by the shape of his weapon, which pissed him off the most, but they never had any good memories. At the thought of his shinigami disgusted by his shape, Kazeshini bared his teeth and his ears lowered. After that had happened, Muramasa came along and freed him from the shinigami. He told him to follow his instinct, and the first thing that he wanted to do was kill.

That was something the pussy of a shinigami kept from him. The joy of killing, something he longed to do but the ass hole never called him out. Scared of his weapon? What bullshit! Once he saw his shinigami, he wanted to settle a score with him, for all the crap that he made him go through. After the Rebellion though, he continued to hunt him down.

Kazeshini calmed himself and looked out into the distance again. It reminded him of the Soul Society, it was similar to this one in his inner realm. He remembered all the things that had happened there. He had so many memories but there was one memory that stuck out. The one thing that he remembered was the kid. He remembered the time when he had to take care of a kid.

He was a zanpakuto that reaped lives, what the hell did he look like? If anyone heard this, they would laugh about it. Just looking at him would make them think that the idea was the dumbest thing anyone would come up with. His appearance was intimidating and he scared his enemies, exploiting them to fear as he killed them. Anyone would laugh about the idea of taking care of a baby.

Everyone, except himself.

Don't get him wrong. If you had told him before he had taken care of the kid, he would laugh his ass off and say that you had to be out of your fucking mind. There was no way he would take care of a kid, but it did happen. It was still fresh in his mind; Kazeshini closed his eyes and thought back to the days after the Zanpakuto Rebellion.

He remembered when he first met the kid; he remembered that he sat near him and looked up at him with a smile on his face. When he first saw him, he had this . . . strange feeling. He didn't know what the feeling was, but it was something like . . . pity. It didn't help the fact that the kid started to cry when he tried to get rid of him so he ended up taking the kid with him. He tried to get rid of the kid but something had held him back from doing so.

He just thought it was because the kid was getting annoying with his crying, but that wasn't it. When the other Zanpakutos made fun of him, he wasn't sure why he wasn't pissed off about it but he was just annoyed. The kid even scared the shit out of him when he almost touched his scythe! Kazeshini didn't think that he actually cared for the kid, but then again, he should have killed him when the kid fucking pissed on his shoulder.

Kazeshini had finally realized how much the kid had actually grown on him when he sat in the forest. He wanted to go after his damn shinigami but the baby had held him back from doing so, literally. The kid fell asleep once he managed to get a hold of him; just looking at his face couldn't keep him from being angry at the kid. He knew that he would never do this with some random person, but this was different. Kazeshini didn't understand why he was even taking care of the kid until later that day.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, I have to admit there was a lot of bad words in the last chapter. It wasn't all that exciting either but I'm finally getting to the good part. This part is just a replay, so there's nothing new besides the thoughts that are going through Kazeshini's head. On with the story.**

flashback = _underline_

Chapter 2 – Innocence

Kazeshini had finally caught up with the group of shinigamis, though he was only there to deal with the bastard. He stood on a roof of a house and was a great deal of distance away from the sight of the four man group. He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard heavy breathing on his shoulder. He looked at the kid that was draped on his shoulder and sighed in annoyance. He didn't want to be seen with the kid or get the kid involved with his fight, so he was just going to put him down for the time being.

Kazeshini took the kid off his shoulder and laid him on the long beam of the house. It was flat so there was no way the kid could fall off.

"Stay there," Kazeshini replied, he got up and looked back at the group.

He looked back down to see the kid roll of the beam and down the roof. The kid ROLLED OFF! Oh shit! Kazeshini quickly dove for the kid before he fell off the roof and crawled back to the top, holding the kid in one arm. He wasn't expecting the kid to roll off, now where to put him? He looked around and spotted a small house near the edge of the small town. It looked safe; it was on the outskirts so that meant it was pretty isolated. Perfect.

Kazeshini went over to the house and strolled inside. It wasn't that big but there was a small straw mat on the floor. He knelt down onto the floor and Kazeshini carefully place the kid down on the mat, making sure that he wouldn't wake up.

"Now, stay here and be a good boy." Kazeshini replied.

Almost in response, the kid gave a smile and a happy gurgle. Kazeshini couldn't help but smile at that. It wasn't his usual smile; his insane, bloody thirsty, killing smile, but it was more of a happy and caring smile. Kazeshini got up and left the house, going to the same spot, on the roof of one of the houses. It looked like he had made it just in time; his wielder was by himself, fighting two sword fiends. It was a perfect opportunity to fight him. There was no one there to interrupt their fight.

Kazeshini was about to attack him when he heard crying within the distance. It sounded like the kid. He started to curse at how bad the kid's timing was and looked back at his wielder. It was perfect! The pussy would have never suspected the attack, but the crying restrained the thought. What to chose; was he willing to give up his chance in order to go to the kid? NO! He wasn't going to give it up!

He felt his will caving in as he loosened his grip on his scythes before he gripped them tightly. Damn it! He knew that he was going to regret this later. Kazeshini turned around to the source of the crying and quickly ran there.

"Don't cry!" Kazeshini shouted as he came skidding to a halt near the door.

He stared in shock at the sight that was in front of him. Sure the kid was there, but there was a woman, a normal woman, holding the kid. He wasn't sure of what to say as the woman cowered in fear and the kid slowly came walking towards him. He stared at the kid as he walked up to him and hugged his leg. Without hesitation, Kazeshini knelt down to the kid, placing both of his scythes on either sides of him, and put his hand on the kid's head.

"Were you going to take this kid?"

"Y-yes," She responded, the woman looked at Kazeshini as he gazed at the kid for a few moments, "He was just sitting here. . ."

"Woman," He looked at her, "I want to you to take this kid-,"

Before he could finish his sentence, the woman screamed. He looked behind him and used his right arm to block the sword the came down. Behind him was a sword fiend.

"Still here? Shinisami dog?" The sword fiend asked. Kazeshini pushed the sword back but it didn't seemed to be fazed by the action.

"All enemies must die!"

Without thinking, Kazeshini grabbed the kid and hugged him to his chest as the blade slammed onto his back. It hurt but he didn't care at the moment. He held the kid in his right arm and used his left to throw one of his scythes backward. It missed and the sword fiend laughed as he knew it prepared to finish him. Kazeshini's left hand held the chain that was attached to his scythe; he gritted his teeth in pain as he jerked the chain forward.

He heard his scythe stab the sword fiend and didn't hesitate to take the chance to finish him as he passed the kid to his left arm, grabbing his other scythe in his right, turned around and stabbed it. He was panting right now; he had killed the sword fiend but he was injured. Why? Why did he protect the kid? His mind soon thought back to when he attacked his shinigami.

_Kazeshini leaped from the building and landed in front of the 9th Squad lieutenant._

"_Fancy meeting you here!" He sneered before throwing one of his scythes at him._

_The people behind the shinigami screamed. The lieutenant flicked his eyes to the side before moving them to the scythe that flew over toward him. He moved his sword in front of him and blocked the scythe that came at him before pushing it back with a grunt._

Did this have something to do with that? Kazeshini finally realized why he was so attached to the kid and why he protected the kid. It was because he was so innocent; he knew nothing and he didn't understand what was going on. He didn't want him to get hit because the kid didn't do anything wrong. Finally, it all made sense; his eye flicked over to the kid. The kid was looking at him now and smiled the same innocent, happy smile.

Kazeshini didn't want the kid to get hurt. He knew that at this rate he wouldn't last long and he wouldn't be in good shape to protect the kid. He didn't want the kid to get hurt and he would do anything to keep him safe right now. He grabbed the kid with his right hand and stood up. He didn't look back as he threw the kid to the woman and told her, "Take the brat. Get away from here as far as you can."

"But-" The woman started to protest.

"Just go."

"Y-yes."

He didn't turn around as he heard the woman run away out of the house and away from the town. He turned his back and looked at the town, where the bastard was fighting. He didn't look back as he heard the child cry for him. Kazeshini wanted to look back, he didn't want to do it. He wanted to be with the kid, just as much as the kid wanted to but he did it to protect him. He felt himself shatter into a million pieces as the kid's cry fade away and walked toward the town. The shinigami's words echoed through his mind.

_Until you fight me head on, I won't finish our fight._

It was time for them to finish their fight. Kazeshini had avoided the battle for too long. He kept his trade mark smile on his face as he walked into to his wielders view, just as he finished dispatching a few of the sword fiends. At first he didn't look at him, trying to hide all evidence of sadness from his face.

"Yo! I've been waiting." Kazeshini called to his wielder, "You said that you wouldn't finish our fight until I fought you head on, right?"

He finally looked at his wielder. His opponent stared at him with a calm and serious look.

"Yeah,"

"Well, here I am."

He looked surprised but covered it up quickly. They made no sudden movements until they both uttered one word, "Reap."

They ran at each other and struck at one another. It was the day Kazeshini had been waiting for, he wanted to fight him, he wanted to beat him but nothing felt right at all. He didn't feel the joy and excitement that he was expecting, no, all he could think was how empty he felt. Their rods clashed together and they stared at one another in the eye.

"Let me ask you something," His shinigami said, "What did you do with the kid?"

Kazeshini looked shocked for a second but then gave him his insane smile. If anyone were to actually look at it closely, they would have known that it was a forced smile.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Kazeshini replied.

He pushed him back and they slashed and blocked each other a few more times before leaping away. He landed away from him and was on his knees; the pain vibrated through out his whole body. It wasn't just the wounds on his body, but . . . he also felt his chest aching.

"It's time to finish this." Kazeshini got up from his feet.

"Yes."

"It looks like we finally agree on something."

His wielder didn't say anything as they finally charged towards one another, sending volley of attacks at each other, dodging and blocking each blow. Finally, Kazeshini jumped back, landing on his feet but felt his spine crack. He gave a small cry in pain as he felt a shockwave of pain race from the wound. Kazeshini stood there in pain, he was leaning back, leaving himself open. He stared up at his wielder who jumped into the air, his own scythe raised, showing no mercy in his eyes. His eyes widened as he finally saw everything come falling down.

He felt the blade slice through him; everything seemed to go into slow motion as he fell toward the ground. He heard crying, everything hurt and now it was the end of all of it.

"Don't . . . cry." Kazeshini murmured.

He felt back slam onto the floor, his strength starting to leave him. He . . . regretted how this had to end. He probably wouldn't see the kid anymore, but . . . he wasn't going to show his pain right now.

"Tell me," Kazeshini said, "Will I turn into a regular zanpakuto?"

"Yeah,"

"When everything goes back to normal, what'll we fight for?"

"To protect someone."

Kazeshini couldn't help but wince at what he had said and frowned. The person the shinigami wanted to protect was that bastard. He didn't dare say his name but he just said, "I see."

"That doesn't sit well with you, does it?" His wielder asked him.

"Of course it doesn't!" Kazeshini answered. He couldn't help but give a weak smile. He couldn't help the fact that they were now similar; how the both of them wanted to protect someone, it was ironic that Kazeshini would even compare to it.

"But . . . it's not like I have a choice." Kazeshini continued. He looked at his wielder and slowly closed his eyes.

**A/N: How was it? Good? Bad? I'm not sure if it's good for my readers but I just hope it works out alright.**


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